25 Subtle Insults Or Jabs That Absolutely Destroyed Someone
We all have frustrating moments, where we have to deal with someone irritating in our daily interactions. Engaging with annoying people usually brings a few choice words to mind though we may not always resort to using them. However, some people seem to have an exceptional talent for making their point in as few words as possible without including swear words.
Today we take a moment to appreciate these clever epithets, found on a thread created by Redditor u/CoatedTrout4, that are subtle yet devastating. Scroll below to get inspired by some of the responses received, where people shared their most imaginative, creative and powerful insults that are utterly savage in their simplicity.
#1 Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries…
#2 Had this rude girl at work a few years back, who thought she was so hot and perfect and.. well you know the type. Anyway, one day I got sick of her attitude and said, “ Kendra, what’s it like being like the third hottest girl here?” Drove her mad.
#3 I had a really self-obsessed grade 12 student start bragging about how good looking he was, trying to get some girls’ attention. He said “people always tell me I look like a model.” I was at my desk marking, while the students were supposed to be working and, without even looking up I piped in with “Yah, a hand model.” His friends roared with laughter and I got many high fives. Even from the “model” kid.
#4 “Ah, so this is what everyone meant.”.
#5 To someone who’s yelling at you “Oh wow, big feelings!!”.
#6 You’re difficult to underestimate.
#7 Wisdom has been chasing you but you have always been faster.
#9 “Have the day you deserve!”.
#10 Man, you’re making that look real difficult.
#11 (After a tirade or rude remark) “Are you okay”, spoken with the deepest sincerity.
#12 The best line I heard was in a gym car park. A martial arts instructor was reversing his car and was nearly upended by a mid-40s feral in lycra on her P plates. She was looking for an argument and chose a soft target – country of origin based on appearance and skin colour. She fired off all insults based around the subject of “go back to where you came from”.
The guy, who I perceived to be much older, said, “In my country, abortion is illegal. But with you, we can make an exception.”.
#13 > “You’re not making the point you think you are.”.
#14 Five years ago, I met up with a friend. I asked her how my eyebrows were ( I had just waxed them and done them nicely). Her response: “I like the left one.” Still remember that.
#15 I think you are talking about things that you don’t have the capacity to understand.
It went right over his head.
#16 Working with you is like working by myself, but harder.
#17 Your grades say marry rich, but your face says study harder.
#18 You seem like the kind of guy who would be embarrassed to buy tampons for his girlfriend.
#19 I’m close to my sister and her friends. I’ve unironically heard, “I like how you’ll just wear anything” after they spent the past hour getting ready.
#20 “Everyone was right about you.”.
#21 When I was living I the UK I learned my favourite, most polite roast, of all times:
“You are so brave to say that”.
I love British sarcasm.
#22 I don’t.respect you enough for you to hurt my feelings.
#23 I work at a grocery store that has a “senior day” once a month (they receive 10% off their entire order, includng alcohol and tobacco). I had a very rude young lady in my lane (probably late 30s). I added the senior discount, she saw it, and I said “I’m not quite sure if you qualify for the senior discount, but I gave it to you just in case. That’s 10% off your purchaseHave a nice day!” The look on her face was priceless. ?.
#24 Man, I wish I had your confidence. Also, one I always remember from xkcd: “the only thing standing in the way of your dreams is that the person having them is you.”.
#25 Couldn’t say it better than Ron Swanson – “When people get a little too chummy with me I like to call them by the wrong name to let them know I don’t really care about them.”.
Shanilou Perera
Shanilou has always loved reading and learning about the world we live in. While she enjoys fictional books and stories just as much, since childhood she was especially fascinated by encyclopaedias and strangely enough, self-help books. As a kid, she spent most of her time consuming as much knowledge as she could get her hands on and could always be found at the library. Now, she still enjoys finding out about all the amazing things that surround us in our day-to-day lives and is blessed to be able to write about them to share with the whole world as a profession.
