25 Heartbreaking Indicators Of Falling Out Of Love
There’s something about falling in love that keeps you coming back time and again despite heartbreak in the hopes of finding the love of your life. While the falling in love part is exciting and addictive, sadly, there comes a time within the lifetime of a relationship when an individual falls out of love too, because not all love stories last. Recently, Redditors opened up about the heartbreaking subtle signs people give off when they are falling out of love. Scroll to check out their thoughts, which we’ve gathered in the gallery below.
#1 Going home to them makes you anxious instead of excited.
#2 You don’t want to be intimate with them anymore – that was my first sign.
#3 This was from some other redditor months back when this question was asked. It always stuck with me though. You can tell when you are not interested in the little things to make them happy. Like making them a snack, or the little nice text messages, or random non-sexual physical affection, or doing one of their chores for them; all unprompted. Arguably you could say that you are starting to no longer care about their happiness.
#4 Apathy is the opposite of love, not hate.
#5 You’d rather stay at work than go home.
#6 Love is not a feeling. This idea of “being” in love is the modern era’s greatest lie. Love is a choice. It’s a choice to respect, honor, and be dutiful to someone even when it is not convenient – even if it sucks.
Lust and desire are feelings you can “fall” out of. Love is a choice and giving up on someone is a choice, not because you “fell” out of something. Every couple I’ve talked to that had lifelong marriages always said the same thing – there are long stretches in any committed relationship where it’s stale, stagnant, and sometimes even downright unpleasant. But it’s the choice to stay and the choice to figure out how to rekindle the relationship that is the most important thing. Abuse and affairs are different – that’s always the retort. Those two things effectively relieve the other person in the relationship of any duty to even try. But short of those two things, if you’re committing to “loving” someone, you do it even when you don’t feel like doing it. If you’re not willing to do it, then you don’t “fall out” of love, you made a choice to no longer commit to the person.
#7 I just want to add that a healthy long term relationship can go through cycles where your feelings wax and wane, sometimes with different feelings in different directions. Don’t immediately assume your love is diminishing, because believe me it can come roaring back even stronger after a period of less interest.
Being appreciative makes life worthwhile, but often times it’s impossible to hold that view 24/7. Sometimes you have to get a bit lost in the weeds before understanding the true value of what you have.
#8 You stop sharing anything about yourself or your day because you don’t want them to know anything about you anymore. You cherish time away from them. You dread being with them. Everything about them annoys you. You don’t want to be intimate with them anymore. You do anything to pacify them or get them to leave you alone. You busy yourself with work, chores, childcare or other reasonsable responsibilities that keep you away from them. You feel complete indifference to their existence.
#9 Spending time with them drains your energy instead of gives you energy.
#10 The way he looked at me changed…. Heartbreaking. Honestly.
#11 You don’t want to share your thoughts, experiences, and memories with them anymore.
#12 You start enjoying time away from them more than you do time with them.
#13 You understand that living without them would be easier.
#14 You make excuses to avoid them.
#15 Resentment is building and nothing to get rid of it.
#16 You prefer them not being there.
#17 Not enjoying spending time with your partner. Feeling irritated by your partner’s presence, quirks, and habits. Losing interest in what’s going on in your partner’s life.
#18 The sound of them eating makes u want to thrust a red hot poker into their eye socket.
#19 For me it was when I would slowly realize the return investment from my effort wasn’t there, so I’d stop putting in effort.
#20 When they become just a roommate.
#21 Coming home is no longer a pleasant feeling.
You’re coming back from work or errands, but you delay your return home, preferring to stop somewhere first, or sitting in your car a couple blocks away psychologically preparing yourself for entering the house.
You’re at home and you hear the car pull up in the driveway or the keys in the door, and you think “Oh no.”.
#22 Spending time with them starts to feel like an obligation or a chore.
#23 When you stop caring, even to get angry. I knew my last relationship was over when I realized I wouldn’t even be mad if he cheated on me.
#24 I can’t stand the sight of him. It happened when I overheard him bad mouthing me to my doctor when I was admitted to emergency with a near death illness. I never got over it because it was a deep betrayal that I never expected. Now I know who he really is. There were so many other things along the way that I overlooked but this was the end.
#25 For me, it’s when I finally realized that I didn’t want to be seen with them in public because it felt embarrassing.
Shanilou Perera
Shanilou has always loved reading and learning about the world we live in. While she enjoys fictional books and stories just as much, since childhood she was especially fascinated by encyclopaedias and strangely enough, self-help books. As a kid, she spent most of her time consuming as much knowledge as she could get her hands on and could always be found at the library. Now, she still enjoys finding out about all the amazing things that surround us in our day-to-day lives and is blessed to be able to write about them to share with the whole world as a profession.
